Thursday, March 26, 2009

Math and the 20 Foot Rule

Ever wonder why the refs direct players to disengage from blocking even though the player is within 20 feet of the pack? Because the refs really don't know how far 20 feet is. So lets put it in perspective.

Each quarter circle from the inside track is 19 feet long. So if blocker Bootylicious is entering a straightaway out of pack, and the nearest pack skater behind her is crossing the mid-point on the oval, she can wail on Death by Chi Chi on the inside track because she is within 20 feet of the nearest pack skater, even if the entire pack is strung out over several feet (less than 10) but still within proximity of each other.

The straightaways are 35 feet. So if Borg member Lead is half a straightaway down the track and the rest of the pack is just entering the straightaway, Mustilla can give her a pop.

How long is 20 feet?

2/3 of the distance needed for a first down.

More than 3 Russian Cleavers lined up foot to toe.

60 Twinkies in a row.

The Height of a 2 story building.

Two and a half pieces of plywood long.

Seven 42" flat screen TVs lined up in a row.

Its a long long way. Keep an eye on those refs. We hate when bad math keeps us from seeing great hits!!!!!

Monday, March 23, 2009

Kickin' It.....Old Skool

My tour is up....I'm finally home. No more sand and nasty little flies.

Diggin "The Kick". Its like the Shriner days but without posts, folding chairs and bad lighting.

And the announcers are rapid. Elle Mc Fu Fu, you're amazing on the mike! Love it with the girls announcing. Its totally bake.

And, uh, what happened to the Betties? Did the Bosses eat them? Its like the Borg or something.

And my, my, my, is Mistilla cookin it on the track. I cannot wait until she burns a few laps around Death By Chi Chi.....

And now with the Betties consumed by the Borg, the Brawlers are totally hard. I predict the Brawlers will take the Bosses this year....because all those steroids will not help the Bosses mental game. Plus, the Brawlers nearly hooked the Sirens.......

Ah, I'm so glad I'm home. Way better then a bunch of stupid camel races. Plus the camels don't have skates, or wear really hot skirts.